The guy in that picture is 6'5'' ...

Yes, that's the sexiest center in college basketball - well, now WNBA - Alison Bales. The nerd alert to her left (your right) is ... a big Shelden Williams fan and Dook football supporter; one of seven. On campus.

She actually is pretty cute for a 6'10'', 270 lb. female ... Imagine the thong she's wearing? You could floss a humpback whale with that thing. And way to class up the photo with the middle finger, Bales. Anyone else horny?

Thank You, Gerald!

After ending the season dropping back-to-back games to UNC and Maryland, Dook backed their way into the ACC tournament, as a seven seed; the lowest seed they've had in the ACC tournament since 1995. This marks their first opening round loss in more than a decade, and during that time, the Dookies were 23-1 in their last 24 games. That's 9 out of 10 ACC Championships.

Oh how the mighty have fallen.

Tenth-seeded North Carolina State abused Dook for most of this game, with shady refereeing and cheap baskets keeping the Blow Devils in it. Honestly, I've never seen players cry about gettin called for fouls more than this team. McRoberts is a big guy inside, naturally he's going to get a few fouls called on him in a game; but the kid flips out when he's called for obvious stuff. Ditto Greg Paulus. He plays the point like a handicapped bull; throwing his body at other guards so much that he's fouled out of several games this season.

I blame this loss squarely on Gerald Henderson, though. When Martynas Pocious has to come in and play big minutes for Dook - and carry the scoring burden - they're in trouble; and God I hope it happens early in the NCAA tournament. Yes, I said it; they're in, but barely. My fingers are crossed so hard that they'll lose a first round game to a mid-major (Creighton? Central Conn.?). Suicide watch for Coach K. Shoulda took the Lakers job, bitch.

HISTORY IN THE MAKING!

For the first time - the FIRST TIME EVER - in the history of the NCAA Coaches Poll, the Dook Blue Devils aren't sitting on it. (Not to say they don't sit lots of polls, but you get it ...) It also marks the first time in 200 weeks they're not on the AP's poll. (They still remain firmly atop Dick Vitale's poll, however.)

Not to say I told you so, but I told you so.

This Dook team is simply not talented at this point. Greg Paulus is not the guy to be running Coach K's offense, Dave McClure shouldn't even be on the floor, Gerald Henderson is two years away from being nasty, DeMarcus Nelson is way too much of a hot/cold player to be counted on, the guy taking the big shots - Jon Scheyer - is a true freshman who looks like a true freshman taking big shots for the biggest program in the country and the bench is just a bunch of meat with high SAT scores.

Josh McRoberts scares me, but honestly, I think the guy might bolt to the NBA this off-season. After Greg Oden and Kevin Durant, who is a sure thing in this draft? And even if he does, he's easily handled at this point; get him in foul trouble, keep the ball away from him down low and force Dook to run a faster offense so he can't get down the court in time ... Maryland did it, for the most part, and blew them out of the water.

Copy and paste this if you want; because it's going to be the truth.

2/14 @ Boston College : Loss

2/18 Georgia Tech : Win

2/22 @ Clemson: Loss

2/25 @ St. Johns : Win

2/28 Maryland: Win

3/04 @ UNC: Loss

With the rest of the ACC schedules panning out, you're talking about a 7-9 conference record; which is going to get them anywhere from 7th to 10th in the ACC Tournament, meaning an early game against UNC, Virginia, Virginia Tech or Boston College at a nuetral site.

Now that we've gotten to the men, we have to work on those Blue Devil women ...

Heroes in a half-shell ... TURTLE POWER!

72-60, Maryland over Dook ... Four ACC losses in a row (three to UNRANKED opponents) now for the Blow Devils. IF they win out, they'd have ten ACC wins. That is a big if, as they have to go to Boston College, Clemson and UNC ...

From start to finish, this game was all Maryland. Dook grabbed the lead after the first two baskets, but couldn't get it back for the last 47 minutes ... Greg Paulus had more turnovers than assists - again - and - again - failed to create the offense that Head Coach Mike Krzyzewski uses to get to the Sweet Sixteen ... and no further.

Oh, and is there some way Pete Gaudet is going to be blamed for all these losses? Is the NCAA being petitioned now? The "Too Many White Starters" Rule, perhaps? The "Too Many Average Former Players as Assistant Coaches" Rule?

... Dook loses again ... It's kind of not even exciting anymore ...

Back-to-back ACC losses for the Blue Devils? Check. How about 5-6 in their last 11 ACC games?!? Check. (Blame this on JJ Redick getting his jersey retired. That guy looks like the south end of a horse going north these days ...)

The Blue Devils are, in my eyes, a Dave McClure lay-up / referee BJ from being un-ranked. I said it before the season started, and I'll say it again: This team will not make the NCAA Tournament. They'll be a high seed in the NIT, though. If Greg Paulus can hit a wide-open shot, that is. (That's two games in a row he's missed the game-winner, FYI.)

What? You don't buy that? Who have they beaten? Georgetown? They'll be the other top NIT seed. They lost to a ranked Marquette team. They beat a bad ranked Gonzaga team - another NIT team. They screwed Clemson - (who will probably end the season unranked having started a nice ACC skid of their own.)Now this is four losses to unranked ACC teams ... That's bad. Keep in mind they still have to play UNC - twice - Go TO Clemson and Boston College, play Maryland -twice - and a decent Georgia Tech team that already beat them!

This is a ten-loss team; with no quality wins and some bad, bad losses. That's the definition of a poor bubble team, and honestly, with the way those mid-majors stepped up last season, it wouldn't surprise me to see them take a few more risks in terms of picks. That means: Dook Bleu Devils, NIT favorites, baby!

Fuck you, Dave McClure ...

Dave McClure - the guy on the left in the picture up top - absolutely saved Dook's ass tonight versus Clemson. Yes, Clemson; the team picked to finish in the bottom half of the ACC. McClure, so bad Clemson decided not to cover him, got lucky and hit an awkward lay-up as time expired. If Coach K didn't have snipers aimed at all the ACC ref's heads, you can bet your ass it would've gotten reviewed and probably over-turned, but that's ACC life ...

In closing, however, let me just point out that if this is how Dook plays at the end of big games, then watch out for the Heels, Terps and BC Eagles ... 3 seconds to go and you give up 5 points? Paulus is a joke. He should've played football instead ...

Now it's GT beating the Devils ...

VT ... GT ... Any other Tech schools wanna knock off the Blue Devils? Please??? After this loss, Dook is 0-2 in ACC play. Sounds strangely like the football team ... Winless in the conference ...

Your 2006-7 Duke Football Wrap-Up

With Florida's stunning victory over Ohio State - and Boise State's consequent rape by the BCS - the 2006-7 college football season is, sadly, over. For Duke University's boys, though, it sort of never began ...

09/02 - Richmond 13, Duke 0 - You read that right. The Blue Devils football team was shut out, at home, by a Division I-AA program - and not even a good Division I-AA program. Arguably the most fitting start to a Duke season imaginable.

09/09 - Wake Forest 14, Duke 13 - OK, Wake won the ACC title this season, but the old sports cliche holds true here: Good teams know how to win games. The opposite is also true. The bad Duke team found a way to lose; having a field goal attempt blocked as time expired.

09/16 - Virginia Tech 36, Duke 0 - Ouch. In a Virginia Tech rebuilding year, they absolutely burn down the Devils, who, to be fair, hadn't been shut out by a Division I-A, ACC opponent until this game ...

09/30 - Virginia 37, Duke 0 - Four more quarters of scoreless football for Duke. Maybe it's just teams from Virginia that give them problems? Nah ... But again, to be fair, this was their first home shut-out against a Division I-A, ACC opponent ...

10/7 - Alabama 30, Duke 14 - Some people say this is the reason Nick Saban got all that dough: Giving up two scores to Duke at home made too many Tide fans stomachs roll.

10/14 Florida State 51, Duke 24 - 51 points to an FSU team that averaged less than half that for the season? On the bright side, they didn't get shut out again ... I'm telling you; that Virginia weather or something ...

10/21 - Miami 20, Duke 15 - Talk about a barn-burner. The week after Miami's big brawl - which cost them several starters for this game - they go and punch Duke in the face. No class, those Hurricanes, none at all.

10/28 - Vanderbilt 45, Duke 28 - Did Jay Cutler come back to QB this one? Oh, he didn't? Duke's defense is just that rough? I see ... Sorry for the mix-up.

11/04 - Navy 38, Duke 13 - Imagine how many push-ups those poor midshipmen had to do when 38 points got scored? What's the deal, Blue Devils? Trying to tire our boys out before they head over-seas? You un-patriotic sons of bitches! That's supporting terrorism, that is.

11/11 - Boston College 28, Duke 7 - Not much to say here ... Duke stunk, again. Thank BC's coach for being such a kind soul and playing his second and third-team guys for most of the second half and keeping the score somewhat respectable.

11/18 Georgia Tech 49, Duke 21 - GT has the best wide receiver in the nation this season, Calvin Johnson. So it makes sense that GT ran for over 200 yards against the Blue Devils. Wait ... No it doesn't. Georgia Tech's back-up QB is the guy to blame for that lop-sided score. He threw for two touchdowns late in the game. That big jerk.

11/25 - North Carolina 45, Duke 44 - I blamed Duke for Nick Saban coming in to Alabama. You can BET this is why Butch Davis got those dollars from the Tar Heels athletic department. The funny thing is, Duke would've won this game if not for a botched extra point. I thank the Big Guy upstairs for that one ...

So there it is. An 0-8 conference record; 0-12 overall record for the pride of Durham. Coach Ted Roof had this to say about his season.

""Certainly we don't have the record that we wanted to have and that part is disappointing. I feel bad for our seniors. I've really been proud of their leadership and their commitment and their consistency. They've been unswerving and they've kept the young guys positive and the team on track."

On track? To 12 losses? The good news is Duke will get their real starting quarterback, Zack Asack, back next season - he was suspended all year for plagiarism. (Coach Roof, ask Coach K to borrow Greg Paulus next season. He was a highly-recruited quarterback out of Syracuse - before selling his soul to play in front of the Cameron Crazies, set all sorts of ACC records and then fade in to NBA obscurity like Jason Williams, Bobby Hurley, Grant Hill, Cherokee Parks, JJ Redick, Shavlik Randolph, etc, etc, etc.) He should make a big difference. Hopefully they don't schedule any I-AA teams next year ... That 20 game losing streak needs to stop ASAP!

VT Upsets Devils in OT

Paulus doesn't look THAT uncomfortable with this ... 69-67 Hokies, in Durham.